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The Northeast Region

By Steve Berry
NOR'EASTER Online - January 2004

Each month there is always a struggle to find something to write about for this monthly column.  Last month I hinted that I may try and write about track safety equipment specifically harness, cages, seats etc... But as usual there is no time for me to pay the proper attention to the subject, and this is one that really needs to be paid special attention to and where bad advice can really be disastrous. From what I’ve heard HMS will again host a monthly meeting on this very topic and this sounds like a great place to learn about and ask questions relating to racing safety devices.
 
So instead let me tell you a story about varmints and cars, and what happens when it gets cold in New England and certain varmints find a place to camp for the winter. Now most of you know that my racing/autocross season ended somewhat early last year, and my car has remained dormant since the end of September with the BMW/PCA joint autocross. Typically I put the car up on jacks and take the wheels off and start the end of the season tear down and general maintenance that goes on periodically throughout the winter. This year I was a little late beginning this process and the car has been paying the price!
 
The reason for this is that a small family of field mice and one large RAT have made a home in my garage. Now the field mice I can somewhat deal with, even though they make a general mess of things (and the droppings are really disgusting) but the RAT did something that made me want to go to war. Besides having the ability to eat a hole in my plastic garbage bin – so it was easier to feed on our leftovers – the damn thing made a nest in my engine bay!
 
Of course the way that I found out about this villain is by opening the hood to disconnect the battery, and Hello Mr. RAT, there he is sitting on my cam cover! Of course my reaction to seeing this was to jump back about ten feet and start yelling obscenities. Mr. RAT immediately made like a flying squirrel and jumped over to a nearby table and into my car cover. I spent the next ten minutes beating the car cover to death with a broom stick, in the hopes that Mr. Osama-Bin RAT would meet his ultimate justice.
 
Unfortunately he would not be so easily dispatched. Somewhat similar to another RAT in Afghanistan that we all know.
 
I cleaned up the mess the damn thing made in my engine compartment most of which was paper, food and droppings. It also decided to disconnect my transponder and hood switch by chewing through the wires, but I can easily fix this. I have no doubt that there is more cleanup that I will have to do before I completely erase his presence from the car...
 
Now some of you may think I'm cruel, or insensitive, but I did not invite this disease carrying rodent into my garage and there was no way I was going to put up with something that so completely insulted my car. Besides, how could I work under the car again worrying about every little sound and squeak that I heard? So I fired volley number two in the war against the rodents and bought some DCON and traps. So far the DCON (yes it's poison) has provided a nice meal for my little friends and my garbage has remained untouched. I believe that the mice and the RAT have finally gone to their ultimate destination – or are well on their way. Time will tell, or perhaps more correctly my nose will tell when and where they have made their last nest.
 
In other news, Ron Mann has joined our board of directors. I assume that we can all look forward to a more entertaining secretary's report from now on! Also we had a preliminary look at the track schedule for the coming year and it looks well balanced and should provide plenty of play time for all us track junkies. Sadly, the group running Fort Devans has made some decisions involving autocross that may preclude those of us with loud unregistered sports cars from taking part in autocross this coming year. We are still in discussions with Devans so don't panic yet if you are potentially affected.
 
And lastly this for this month – this is the time of year to renew your Nor’easter subscription. The renewal form along with the ballot for electing the board members were sent out last month, so if you didn’t get it please contact me and I will send you out a new form. I’ve had some reports that letters that should have arrived did not.
 
Until next month, be safe, stay warm and I hope that you have enjoyed your Holiday season!