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| I
guess winter has finally arrived as I pen this on the Monday following
Christmas. I froze my nose off (allow me some poetic license here) yesterday
watching the Patriots dismember the Jets at the Meadowlands last night.
Actually with three layers under my down coat, lined jeans and toasty warm
boots I was much better off than my companions who forced me to leave after
the Pats final touchdown as they were shivering uncontrollably. As one
of them was driving I had no choice but to leave as I was not about to
try and find a cab for Joyce and me at the stadium, to take us back to
New Rochelle.
Then, we arrived home to 8” of powdery white stuff; there was only an inch or two in NY and CT. So, it is with that input that I say with confidence that winter has arrived. And as such, it’s a little difficult to be thinking about getting the 911 ready to trailer down to Sebring in early February, and hoping that I’m not forced to load it onto the trailer in a blizzard or have to tow with snow or ice on the roads. Last year while returning from Sebring I ran into very icy roads in North Carolina around 4 or 5 in the morning so holed up at a Denny’s and had a leisurely breakfast while I waited for the sun to rise and melt the road ice, which it did right on schedule. Now, I always get a kick out of relativity…not the Einstein variety but our every day living life “relativity”. “Living life”, that reminds me of one of my favorite lines and I regret I don’t know where it came from for proper attribution but here it is, “Life is what happens when you’re planning for the future”. Back to relativity. Two weeks ago Joyce and I were conducting a site visit in Stowe, VT for the 2006 Ramble. Yea, that’s how far ahead I have to be planning and working, and in fact I would have preferred to have 2006 already put to bed, but a new house (Hurray, we’re off the hill) and other non Porsche things occasionally get in the way of these more important things on the “to do” list. And it was very interesting how the moment we crossed the NH/VT border, we found snow on the ground and the farther north we got, of course, the more snow. In fact, we stopped in Quichee at Simon Pearce for some last minute Christmas gifts and that river was frozen solid. Any of you who’ve visited Quichee know that it is a fast running river, and while we’ve had an occasional day or two of cold weather down here, it was eye opening that only 150 miles or less to the north and we were in an entirely different world. So the whole point of this column was to give you a little taste of what goes into our annual Spring Ramble. For those Ramble devotees, you’ll remember that we visited the “Top Notch” in Stowe back in 2001, so 2006 seems about the right amount of time between visits so that we shouldn’t be bored with a return trip, on different roads to Stowe, staying at different resort, not yet to be named in case we don’t go there, and that is a distinct possibility. Property X was distinctly underwhelming in its presentation from the road. However, the rooms were among the nicest and best appointed that we’ve encountered on our Rambles; so we have one + and one – right now. Then we come to the registration area at the resort and I can just see the jam-up and long line resulting from the limited space available. When we went on the tour of the resort with the Director of Sales, I brought up this problem and told her how the best registration we ever had was handled and that to date no resort had been able to duplicate that. Why, I do not know because it makes the most sense to me. We’ll see what she comes up with Let me ask you, dear reader, whether or not you hate standing in lines as much as I do. That is one of the things I always discuss when making a site visit…good, and prompt service. This extends from the registration process, to enough servers in the cocktail lounge to properly service our crowd when we’re hangin’ out after arriving and before our private reception, to enough bar set-ups and bartenders during our reception to enable the lines to move smoothly, to enough servers during the plated dinner and proper help in the kitchen so we do not take 4 hours for a dinner that should be done in two, to a proper level of help to continue to replenish the breakfast items at our buffet, to a swift check out procedure. Reminds me of our driver last night, a friend of our host at the football game who responded, to the suggested plan of one of the other people in the Suburban, to avoid some traffic, “I just point the truck and I get there when I get there.” I hadn’t ever thought of things that way as I’m always jockeying to get around cars that are going slower than I want to drive, clogging up the left lane when they should be in the right lane. But it certainly explained all those vehicles in the stop-and-go right lane on Rte. 495 waiting to get onto Rte. 290 when I speed on down in the left lane and always find an opening to get onto 290 without cutting anyone off as always someone is not paying attention to the task at hand. Anyway, standing in lines is simply something that I do not do, it is not in my vocabulary and I will do anything to avoid it, anything except harming or encroaching on another person’s rights. So I will go read a paper, or have coffee, or leave my groceries in the store and come back another time, or leave at some ungodly early hour of the morning to avoid a line…you get the picture. And I bring that to my planning of our Rambles. The cocktail lounge will be great for our hangin’ out together, nice size and configuration, but Joyce and I were again under whelmed with the cocktail reception area, but it can be made to work with some adjustments, and the entry way into the “grand ballroom” where our plated dinner would be. While the ball room space is fine, getting there is less than what I’d like, so we discussed how the resort could spruce it up with plants and fabric, (this area has been designed as a large open area right for the registration of several hundred people attending a meeting or seminar but not real attractive for our group heading into dinner). We had dinner that night in the resort’s restaurant and enjoyed one of the better meals we’ve ever had. After I complimented the maitre d’ on this fact, the chef came out, asked how things were and we chatted a while. Hey, someone’s gotta do these site visits. Unfortunately, there is no way to know how well an individual dinner, in a small restaurant will translate to a meal for 250 hungry drivers/passengers, prepared in an entirely different kitchen with different staff. I had made an appointment for both of us to have a message after our site tour. This resorts spa is brand new and designed and outfitted to be the best. Before our massages we hung our robes – we’d changed in the room prior to going to the spa – in the men’s and women’s respective locker rooms (in our private lockers with our own combinations) and walked past the men’s and separate women’s whirl pools into the coed area where we enjoyed a waterfall pool where the water from the falls provides a powerful message and then spent a few minutes in the mineral and salt tub, large enough for 10-15 people. After relaxing for a few minutes in the single gender lounge with some fresh juice we enjoyed our own private messages. To cap off the event, we walked a few feet past the indoor pool and outdoors along the heated concrete to the outdoor hot tub surrounded by snow. As much fun as this experience was for us, I recognize that very, very few of you Ramble folks would take the time for such a spa experience. Even so, I’ve asked if the property would throw in the spa facilities – without the massages – as there would not be anyone else at the resort (we’d take all the rooms) but the response was “we can not do that but I’ll see how low we can get the facility charge for your group”. The gym, indoor pool and outdoor hot tub are in included in the package. Finally, there are contractual issues to be dealt with. One of the more crucial elements is the “attrition” that is allowed. That is, if I contract for 125 rooms, by how many may I reduce that without a penalty and within what time element of our function. The initial blank contract says that any rooms not taken 60 days prior to the event will be charged at 50%. That is simply unacceptable and I have suggested that I could live with a 15-20% reduction, 30 days prior to the event with no penalty or cost. We’ll see what they come back with. As there are so few properties that can handle our numbers, within our driving radius, and that are willing to take us for one night only, this process must be initiated well in advance. For example, one couple having stayed at the Wentworth in Portsmouth, NH a while back asked me to consider that property. I can report that they will not consider us for one night only and are not pleasant to deal with, one of the “my way or the highway” attitudes. So, for the moment Stowe, VT is on hold pending our site visit to an upper NH resort that we have not yet visited on a ramble. Time and space do not permit me to delve into the machinations involved in getting the 2005 Ramble finalized even though the date was contracted for twelve months ago. Stay tuned for 2006. I LOVE THESE – JOYCE SAID I HAVE A SICK SENSE OF HUMOR 1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. 2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..." 3. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything." 4. A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here." 5. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. 6. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and! says: "A beer please, and one for the road." 7. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other! : "Does this taste funny to you?" 8. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" Doc says "It's Not Unusual." 9. Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy. 10. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 11. Two termites walk into
a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"
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